As soon as my eyes went to this news from HSBC – “We want fewer clients who earn less than AED20,000 a month”, I went into a round of blurps and hiccups.

It just doesn’t abide by any logic to so senselessly give away all the years of positioning that the bank has done – World’s local bank – and make it look like no more than a hollow marketing speak. And what did all those market / financial / economic analysts drawing their dirhams from the bank do to recommend such a move?

According to official figures, most of the population in the UAE earn less than AED 20,000 a month. And what use are those screaming HSBC ads about “never underestimating the importance of local knowledge” when they have absolutely got it all wrong this time around.

Other than destroying the image it has spent millions of dollars creating, it is hard to see what purpose HSBC thinks alienating “classified as poor” people in the UAE serves. Does it think these people are stupid? Do they clog up HSBC’s brilliantly dynamic (add my visual sacarsm there!) phone banking systems with their moronic questions? Or are they just unsightly? Perhaps the bank wants a richer, better nourished, better looking customer – is that the subtext?

Come’on… when I look at my same-age peers, I can find very few who will be crossing the HSBC definition of poor… but if you consider the lifetime value of these professionals, they are very soon going to move to the HSBC definition of not-poor and then, it will be absolutely ridiculous to expect them to switch over to HSBC.

And with this move, it is only a matter of time before “the bank becomes too poor to let us have them look after our money”. I’ll let you know.

For the HSBC marketing team… it’s better to spend another few millions to re-position the bank as the “world’s only elitist bank“.

Say what you want about whether President Obama deserves the Nobel Peace Prize. His acceptance speech was an effective combination of humility—”I do not view it as a recognition of my own accomplishments”—and political savvy. From now on, everything he does will have an indirect stamp of the world’s most sought-after prize.

09:00AM Breaking news:
US President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Barack Obama is meeting now with his Advisors to discuss strategy in Afghanistan and Pakistan.

05:00PM Breaking news:
A short while from now, US President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Barack Obama will be addressing the G8 minister on the latest series of UN sanctions to be imposed.

More than anything, the abstract justification offered by the Nobel Committee Chairman was anything but clear. And Obama has used that also to his advantage.

If the Nobel Committee couldn’t explain the rationale, Obama decided to do that for himself: “I will accept this award as a call to action – a call for all nations to confront the common challenges of the 21st century.”

Wow… more than anything, that single statement has rekindled a long-forgotten dream in the deepest realms of my mind – the dream of winning the Nobel. If Obama has got this prize for something he is expected to do, why the heck can I not get it.

I will leave the choice of the prize to the Nobel Committee… but if they give me an economics prize, I will go and create some revolutioning economic theory within the next 3-4 years or if they give me the peace prize, I will marshall resources to distribute the white dove and the white flag everywhere…. and better still, if they give me the prize for medicine, I will develop a 100% cure for swine flu.

Anyways, not taking away whatever little credit the Nobel Committee deserves, they have indirectly done an immense help by choosing Obama – they have ensured that he doesn’t go to war atleast during his term at the White House. This is like the typical case of tipping the waiter right as you enter the restaurant so as to ensure good service rather than experience the service (good/bad) and then decide on tipping them.

Now, shifting our eyes to the money that came with the prize…. Obama made sure that he spreads the wealth around: “This award is not simply about the efforts of my administration — it’s about the courageous efforts of people around the world. And that’s why this award must be shared with everyone who strives for justice and dignity.”

I am also striving for justice and dignity in whatever manner I can for whichever cause I can, so I need my share from the $1.4 million prize money.

Am waiting….

==== ANOTHER TAKE ON THIS ISSUE ==== By GJS

Almost everyone is shocked and amused that President Obama will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize this year, less than 9 months into his first term. People think it’s a mistake and very premature to give him an award before he has done anything meaningful. I vehemently disagree. The Nobel Committee’s mistake has been to give him only that one prize. This should have been a year of a total Obama sweep.

This horrendous mistake can be at least partially atoned for by announcing him the winner of the Economics prize next week. The Swedish bank should take note. He rolled out the biggest stimulus package in history and managed to stimulate the economy by spending just a fraction of it! He caused a shocking (although temporary) upswing in GM’s year-on-year sales figures for a couple of months! And he has managed to convince the smartest man in the world (himself) that he can spend trillions on everything and yet reduce the deficit, a miracle that defies the laws of math. How can some bald, bearded, bespectacled professors whose achievements are limited to academic journals, ever compare to such achievements in Economics?

The Literature prize should also have gone to him. He has written two books – both bestsellers and books that served as launchpads for the most remarkably historic election win in human history. Anyone can write books that launch revolutions. But books that launch campaigns? How could the committee have overlooked that? Herta Muller’s writings depict the “landscape of the dispossessed”, they say? Obama’s books have made most of the country act like they are possessed!

Now we come to Medicine. Obviously! Like duh! Healthcare reform! Winners of the Medicine prize are usually recognized for one idea or that. Obama has had so many ideas on healthcare in the last 2 years. He went from talking about a single payer system, to talking about a Congress-like plan for America, to supporting a public option, to spurning a public option, to whatever he thinks should be done now. If the Peace prize is meant as encouragement or impetus for what he is trying to do, the same logic could have worked for healthcare reform. I don’t see how anyone other than the President deserved this prize.

Physics is next. This might seem like a bit of a stretch, but bear with me here. You, the reader, might not agree, but I am sure the Nobel Peace Prize committee will back the soundness of my argument. Think about the laws of motion. The first one. In the absence of force, a body maintains its state of rest or motion in straight line at constant speed. Obama, not through his research, but through his behavior, has debunked this so-called law. Without anyone applying any force or pressure whatsoever, he has seamlessly changed the direction of so many of his policies. Don’t-ask-don’t-tell was, he said as a candidate, something that is not just morally wrong, but practically wrong, and should be repealed right away. Nine months later, he seems to be traveling in the opposite direction. The same story with torture, rendition, personal privacy, limits on executive power, and so on. A remarkable 180-degree shift without any force being applied. Screw you, Newton! Physics Nobel for Obama!

Chemistry is, admittedly the hardest. And after contriving phony reasons for all these prizes, I am as mentally exhausted as the Peace prize committee must have been after crafting their press release. So I am just going to say….. he catalyzed the whole nation and indeed the whole world with his election. Catalysis – chemistry – give him the effing prize already.

And don’t think I have forgotten about the Fields Medal. By not getting anything meaningful done after having huge majorities in both chambers of Congress, he has dealt a telling blow to the universally accepted mathematical canard of “Majority”. But that can wait until he gives 2 full years worth of empirical evidence of being able to do anything even with those huge numbers.

Poor or rich – HSBC defines it all!!!
If you wish to know whether you’re eligible for that “help-the-poor” scheme, ask HSBC. A critical review of how HSBC has shot itself in its leg by showing its back to the much reverred – world’s local bank – tagline.

If Obama can win a Nobel, I also can…
A personal take on the Nobel Committee’s selection this year….

The breathtaking Langkawi Island (Malaysia)
A tourist review on Langkawi Island in Malaysia along with tips on not-to-miss tourist attractions and suggestions

Being forgetful during a crisis is hazardous!!!
Attempting to highlight instances where common business rationale is thrown out of the window when crisis comes knocking on the doors

Why didn’t we see the crisis coming?
An introspection into why this crisis dropped on us all of a sudden… and what the root cause of this shocking surprise was!

Today’s world… building perceptions of instant gratification
We live in an age when not only do we want everything now, the technological innovation and our lifestyles have created the perception that it is actually achievable.

ENOUGH is ENOUGH
It is high time we DO something about the way India is run – raw thoughts of a wounded Indian

Overflowing with culture, beaches, and loads of natural scenery, Langkawi is undoubtedly the perfect getaway for anyone looking for a pleasant holiday.

Details of my visit:
Period of visit: July-August 2009
Duration of stay: 4 days (wasn’t enough!!!)

Assuming that you are comfortable with making the travel and hotel booking… I would fast forward to landing in Langkawi. After a lot of research on trip advisor and other resources, we decided on trying out a different hotel experience… by booking to stay in chalets at the Berjaya Beach & Spa Resort. Unlike other higher star-rated hotels which have the usual concrete hotel buildings facing the sea, this resort had only chalets spread out from deep within the forest and extending to the sea… with lovely views of the forest and the waters depending on the choice of chalets. The resort property was kept as natural as possible with no significant concrete setup anywhere inside.

Plus points of the resort:
1. Very different kind of accomodation in the chalets
2. Prompt room service
3. Good sumptuous breakfast at the Dayang Cafe
4. Close to major attractions of Langkawi
5. In case of early check-out, a spare chalet is provided as a shower room to freshen up before leaving.
6. The in-house spa, Ayura Spa, is one of the best in Langkawi

Minus points of the resort:
1. Premier chalets have far better interiors than Superior chalets esp. for the incremental rate charged
2. In-house restaurants aren’t so great but doable (esp. for people who don’t like much of sea food like me)

However, on the whole, it was a resort I would love to go back to.

Places to visit during the trip:
1. Ayura Spa
- Their signature massage is just amazing
- You get to use the natural jacuzzi, sauna and other spa facilities for free when you book for a massage
- It is within the resort and hence very accessible
- Need to make a booking 1-2 days in advance esp. in peak tourist season
Time taken is approx. 3 hours (2 hours for the massage and 1 hour for the pre-massage indulgence)
Best time of the day: Early evening before sunset

2. Cable Car
- 10min walk from the resort in the Oriental Village
- Cable car reaches a maximum height of over 750mtrs above the sea level from the ground
- Breathtaking view of the rain forest, the mountains and the sea
- Option to get off the cable car and spend time at the landing stations (both middle and top)
- Is operational only when the weather is good so need to plan accordingly
Time taken is approx. 1 hour
Best time of the day: Sunny morning or afternoon (day-time only)

3. Oriental Village
- Regular shops selling souvenirs and local handicrafts
- Food court serving cheap food (indian, arabic, malay, and chinese cuisines) but only till sunset
Time taken is approx. 2 hours (at the max)
Best time of the day: To be done along with the cable car ride

4. Mangrove Boat Tour
- The only tour operator one should go for is Dev’s Mangrove Boat Tour since it has an extended tour which actually includes the fun and educational part of the mangrove forest tour
- An experienced guide takes you on a speed boat to the cave across the river (very crowded since all tour operators bring tourists there)… explains the science behind it; takes you inside to look at the thousands of bats and the calcium fossil deposits; shows the mangrove trees and their peculiarity; physical face-off with the monkeys roaming around
- From there, while all other tour operators go back up the river to the fish farm (details on this later), the Dev’s Tour Guide heads down the river towards the sea… sailing silently through the river for over an hour with just mangrove forests on either side; moves closer to the bank to show snakes, lizards, otters etc; passes through the fisherman’s village (explains the history); reaches the Andaman Sea and the boat picks up speed to counter the tide and add to the fun (it was raining in the sea and that added to the excitement and adventure); reaches an isolated island locked between two mountains with absolutely no one there; get to spend some time alone with your partner; then go further into the sea and then turn back towards the river from the other side (the whole trip is a full circle); reach the fish farm to enjoy a sea-food lunch; watch the fishes being feeded in the fish farm and then return back to the starting point.
- This tour leaves you tired for the rest of the day so don’t plan anything that is physically strenous for the rest of the day
Time taken is approx. 6 hours (starts at 9AM from the hotel and ends around 3PM)
Best time of the day: -

5. Dev’s Nature Walk
- Dev is a very renowned naturalist in Langkawi (owner of the Dev’s Adventure Tours mentioned above) and undertakes morning and evening nature walks across the mangrove forest.
- It happens only on select days and hence has to be planned in advance
Time taken is approx. 2 hours
Best time of the day: Morning

Some other attractions:
6. Underwater World (takes approx. 3 hours)
7. The 3 Waterfalls (Temuran, Seven Wells, Durian)
8. Chenang Beach for all water sports

There are lot more tourist attractions that can be explored but since our trip was short, we just managed to cover these… So, if you do not want to miss out on the best attractions, plan in advance and include all the above in your itinerary.

Some important links to visit:
1. Dev’s Adventure Tours
2. Trip Advisor – Langkawi Review

One major pain point in times of this crisis comes from the fact that businesses lose sight of the overall business objectives while reactively maneouvering the downturn.

My thoughts are more in the context of organizations which spawn many other firms from within i.e. a holding company managing a number of large-scale projects.

BUSINESS LOGIC 1

Observation
When the times were good and power was directly derived from the size of the team/organization people commanded, every project was spawned into a separate organization with its institutional overheads. So, what essentially started off as projects being run by a single firm ended up being ‘n’ number of firms coming under one umbrella of the originating company.

Implications
Along with the size comes the cost of managing a gigantic organization. In the context I am basing my thoughts on, these projects being in a conceptualization / early-development stage were by no means having any revenue stream (leave alone it being sustainable) to be self-reliant as an organization. So, when the crisis came along… sustainability became the key question on everyone’s minds.

Where did the logic go wrong?
It is so very commonsensical that there is a maturity cycle for any long-term initiative that an organization undertakes. Firstly, a project runs on a fixed timeline (a start date and a definite end date). So, a project should remain a project until it completes it intended objective and then, when it seems to have reached a certain stage of maturity whereby it can sustain on its own and be an independent organization in itself, should it be spun off from the originating organization.

Had this approach been taken, the current downturn would have been far easier to ride out. There wouldn’t have been a reckless spending on opex in the past, no excess manpower to be laid off in a disappointing manner and no questions marks of the magnitude that are staring at us now!

BUSINESS LOGIC 2

Observation
When an organization was envisioned in the postive, growing economy, even the thoughts of companies not being self-profitable but being there for a larger good was considered rational.

Implications
Many projects have been undertaken with a very sensible big-picture thought of leveraging these projects to propel many other commercial ventures managed by the larger stakeholders of the local economy. However, when the crisis dawned, all this talk of “larger good of the local economy” was thrown out of the window and everyone was asking “where’s the money?” and “is it profitable or not?”

Where did the logic go wrong?
The envisioning of any organization should never be forgotten even in good times or bad times. A strategic project for the larger good of the local economy can rarely be profitable on a commercial basis. And if the dichotomy was not internalized by the powers-to-be, I guess they were in the wrong business in the first place. And by turning over the basic idea behind running a business, more harm might be done to the larger economy in the long-term and hence there is a strong need to stick to the basics and look for other ways to get these initiatives going.

Disclaimer: These are just my personal opinions about a business case I’ve come to know of. Plus, I have not taken any names here and so I shouldn’t be held responsible for maligning any real organization I am associated with or otherwise.

It is not the economists alone whom we should blame for not foreseeing the crisis. There is a long list of professions that failed to see the crisis brewing… from the road-side palm reader to the bankers on the wall street, even the academic gurus, the journos and the government machinery is also to blame.

But, barring the economists, for all others, it was just a side game. So, the spotlight again goes back to the “economists” who were relatively better equipped to smell the tsunami tide coming our way. No matter what different reasons these economists give about their blinding of this crisis, major reasons that stand out are
(1) lack of big picture about potential impact of any bubble burst in the economy
(2) capitalist inclinations leading to “capitalism is always right” mentality
(3) reckless and irrational use of quantitative models to explain their “works” without an eye for the ground realities

Although the relation between financial institutions and the wider economy seems so commonsensical, no one factored this relationship in their strategizing and even if they did, it was just a minor side reference.

So, does this mean that economists are not the root cause and that there is something more primary than this… yes!!!! It is the academic world. Having been to one of the hallowed IIMs, I have had a chance to watch the faculty closely on what they do to churn out the theories / frameworks / methodologies that
professionals and companies adopt sincerely without question. Looking a little deeper into this…. the paradox that shows up is that the academic work is based on economic orthodoxy derived from economist views from the early 20th century when markets operated in a different manner. So, whatever comes out of this academic exercises is basically an extension of those views into the present context. And the disconnect happens when a professional of the new millenium believes in a fresh economic perspective but uses archaic models to execute his/her ideas. It is so like putting a cart wheel on an aeroplane.

Quantitative models seem to be everything for the businesses… and the commonsensical ground realities were mere aberrations. How I wish we knew that these aberrations are going to drown us as well along with the models.

So, one basic lesson that I learnt was… “keep your ears to the ground while you watch the sky”! For any senior manager, it is important to go beyond pure quantitative models and understand the business environment at the operating level.

The IIM alumni in the Middle East region are gearing up to organize the first-ever Gulf Summit. The event’s main theme, “Riding out the Downturn”, is expected to get major business leaders from the region and outside to ideate on the global economic crisis.

Now when we were considering hosting this event at Hotel Atlantis… not just for the pseude value of the venue but more from an economical perspective (managed to get a competitive deal), one of the alumni highlighted the plight of a whale shark which has been kept in captivity at the hotel. Instantly, the group came to a consensus to shift the event to an alternate venue… and the Hotel Atlantis went out of favor.

Save Sammy Campaign

Recognized as a threatened species vulnerable to extinction, one whale shark specimen has found fame in captivity. “Sammy,” a young female whale shark, is being held at the Hotel Atlantis’ massive aquarium. rowing up to 65 feet long, whale sharks are the largest fish in the world – fitting for Dubai, a city trademarked for having the biggest and best of everything.

Sammy’s confinement has kicked up a global protest. The World Wildlife Federation launched efforts for Sammy’s release. Locally, Dubai-based groups and newspapers have demanded the same, accusing the Atlantis of profiting from Sammy’s capture. The most scathing indictment comes from Jason Baker, Director of PETA Asia-Pacific, in a letter reprinted, in part, by Dubai’s Gulf News. Baker wrote: “Removing animals from the wild and putting them on display in captivity does nothing to promote true conservation efforts and is often a death sentence for marine animals who are torn away from their families and placed in a foreign environment. In the ocean, Sammy would live in deep water, swim for hundreds of miles to feed and mate, and constantly feel the ocean’s currents…in your hotel, she will be forced to live in a virtual bathtub.”

I think we all need to express our reservation to this hotel’s wrongdoing by atleast keeping away from the hotel if not vocally speaking against it in public.

One major aspect of my life that seems to have missed the “revolution bus” is the elevators at my office… or perhaps the ones at the mall. I think they are a good lesson on the concept of waiting. Even though it doesn’t make any difference, I still end up hammering on the buttons until I see a elevator door open up for me. However, the difference it has made to me is… it increased my impatience.

And when I talk of user frustation, there is a whole list that crops up… right from the endless wait for the computer to come out of stand-by / hibernate mode when I want to get working on something important… to the water heater that takes atleast 5 minutes to dole out hot water. When we come to think about it, it’s crazy that we cannot accept those few minutes to be a reasonable time to wait. The real question is how valuable that delay time is to us in the real terms… what do we want that few minutes for? or what can we do in that time?

The whole world seems to be running like a clock in fast-forward mode. while I’m constantly amazed by the pace of today’s world and the flexibility that technology brings to our use of time, it is definitely changing our perception of the value of the minutes and seconds that make up our very existence.

What is it we’re looking to achieve…. fame in as little time as possible. Shortcuts seem to be the mantra of today. Look at the umpteen reality/talent TV shows…. blocking every channel for most part of the day… this has created such a phenomenon that ordinary public (including a rickshaw puller and a laundry man) queue up for days together in thousands just for a chance of giving an audition to the judges with no regard for whether it results in a praise or a ridicule. At best, this whole journey promises them a chance of short-term accelerated fame with no guarantee of longevity. No one really bothers about becoming the “lambi race ka ghoda”… the problem is that fame is the ultimate objective and now this has become to look like the most viable career option for the younger generation.

Come to think about it… one of the biggest paradoxes is the whole “voting” phenomenon. When we have elections coming up, there are social organizations and the Election Commission themselves who run around spending money just to get the eligible citizens to register for a vote…. and then make all means possible for them to cast their vote. If you think about all the struggles there have been in history with people fighting for that right to vote, it is just amazing that so many are now so passive about exercising that freedom. Shift frames to the TV shows… and the voting statistics seems to be breaking records every week. And lo’ exercising that vote actually costs people money. Yet we need encouragement to vote for free for something as important as deciding the political future of countries.

Can’t get crazier than this… huh!!!! We seem to have really got our priorities wrong somewhere… or maybe we have moved away from the reality. So, when it comes to thinking about our time and how we use it… it’s all about keeping it real and not surreal.

Wow… cannot imagine that 3 months have gone since I last wrote here!!! So much has happened…. all along on the global front, on my professional front and also personal front. I have so many things to write on… dunno where to start

Some topics that are on top of my mind are:
1. The global crisis and its impact on a middle-class expat in the Middle East
2. What’s the best thing to do for me in this crisis… continue on the job or go back to school?
3. Making marriage work… I seem to be doing a good job there [LOL]
4. The Year of Uncertainty 2009
5. Movies / Pets / Traveling / Shopping… experience-sharing
6. The upcoming 1st Pan-IIM Gulf Summit… behind the scenes
7. Across the Desert – My road trip to Saudi Arabia
Let me ponder over the coming weekend (yuppieee…. it’s an extended one!!!) and start somewhere…. meanwhile, sincere apologies for the inexcusable absence.

However, can’t resist confessing that this month (March of 2009) is a very important month for me… a month of perseverance and decisions.

It is high time we stop talking and start acting… nothing else will change our country! I wouldn’t delve into the pain that we have been through or the anguish of many others.

However, what I propose is an ACTION plan to target the root of all our problems – the mediocre polity and the irresponsible media.

1. Circulate this to all alumni groups that you’re a part of (e.g. pan-IIMXL, pan-IIT, pan-REC, etc)

2. Get a group-level commitment from the alumni leadership as well as inputs / feedback from these alumni groups

3. Create an ENVISIONING GROUP to finalize the work plan and roll it out based on self-nomination with recommendations from peers / peer nomination

4. Envisioning Group to draft the action plan and create discrete work products

5. There are two approaches that can be pursued in our action plan:
(1) Create a SHADOW GOVERNMENT (as in the UK governance model) to focus on governance issues – reviewing government policies, drafting new recommendations and providing a citizen-government interface as required
(2) Directly enter into politics by forming an independent party and contesting elections

The second approach might be pursued at a later stage but the first approach can be instantly taken up based on the action plan prepared by the Envisioning Group… and the plan is as proposed below:

6. Identify WORKING GROUPS that need to be constituted for implementing the action plan (along with the expected effort / proficiencies required for each of the working groups)

7. Communicate the plan to the complete volunteer groups to seek feedback and support

8. Incorporate feedback and then issue notification for WORKING GROUP nominations

9. Review the nominations and ensure independence (prevention of conflict of interest with current political establishment in a manner similar to what is done with consulting firms)

10. Create the WORKING GROUPS with clear roles and responsibilities

11. Each of the Working Groups needs to prepare their internal plan for actual roll-out and get going!!!

12. Alongside these groups, there will be a need for additional volunteers to run the SHARED SERVICES GROUPS such as Media Relations, Legal, Finance, Administration to basically provide shared services support to the Working Groups
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH… now can we please start acting on it??

WE NEED ACTION!!!!

Important suggestions from readers open for consideration (being compiled as they appear on the comments to this post):

1. The working groups may be decentralized across regions for easier operations

2. An approach of “parallel government” shouldn’t be followed since it might be short-term and might derail governments… rather we should work on studying various areas and providing our recommendations

3. We need to leverage RTI and other such provisions to demand accountability from the government and possibly strengthen non-profit organizations deploying these for the same

4. It would be good to make reccomendations on various areas of governance and then the risk of implementing it falls on the government. Once the common man realizes the merit of our recommendations and sees no action, the government’s credit is at stake

5. Need to nurture it more rather than marely putting it out on blog as just an idea

6. Some areas to be covered by working groups are: Security, Internal, Extremist – Terrorism, Extremist – Naxallite, General Policing, Cross Border, Terrorism, International Propaganda and Support and Other Socio-Economic Issues

7. Every citizen who votes for some candidate with a feeling of “voting for best of the worst” has an alternative now… as per the Article 49-0 of the Constitution, a person can go to the polling booth, confirm his identity, get his finger marked and convey the presiding election officer that he doesn’t want to vote anyone! If a candidate wins by “x” votes and there are more than “x” voters who have exercised this right, the poll results will be cancelled and will have to be re-polled. Also, the candidature of the contestants will be removed and they cannot contest the re-polling, since people had already expressed their decision on them

8. One long-term measure is to enter into active politics and clean the system

9. We need to build awareness amongst the voting public on vital issues – healthcare, education, public utilities, economy, national security – and that is where these working groups can identify and communicate what the government is doing for us and what is not being done for us